Confidence

Confidence

by Aayushi Roy

Confidence.

You may not have it.

You may doubt it.

You may abhor it.

But, girl—you do need to carry it.

Such a fervent attribute, Confidence! 

One might have a thousand doubts, a million insecurities, maybe a million fears, and a crippling sense of failure, too. Yet when they have the mask of confidence on, they hardly seem fazed.

The trait of appearing unfazed garners strength and respect in the world. It keeps you safe from harsh judgments and your own distress. It protects you and gives you the opportunity to work and shine through, without the overwhelming doubts shadowing your capabilities. 

Confidence is the most sexy trait one can acquire.

But it’s not always that we are able to carry it. Of course, we are not always able to carry it, especially on those days or weeks when we are feeling broken. However, on the days when all fight seems lost from the body, we need to work on letting our confidence work for us. It might not be easy, but we are going to get it done.

How? Here are a few easy steps:

Talk to the mirror.

• Let’s stand in front of our mirrors and see ourselves. What do you see? A happy person, ready to go out and conquer, or a tired one, wanting to sleep in, just for one more day? Whoever you are, we are going to make the most of our day, together! Look at the mirror and stand straight. Tighten your shoulders and hold your head high. Widen your stance and take up your space. Now, boldly look into your own eyes and call out, “I’m ready. I’m going out there and getting the work done for the day.” Hold your head high and say, “I can do this, I CAN!” But above all, mean what you say, don’t just make an act of it.

Celebrate your daily victories, both small and big alike.

• Sure, you had a bad day, but you got through it. Maybe you had a difficult test, but you passed it. Even though you couldn’t get out of bed this morning, you did. Not to mention, you went to work too. Celebrate all your victories, no matter how big or how small. Maybe cook yourself your favourite or your comfort food—whatever feels like home to you. Take yourself out for movies, or maybe get into your PJs, light your candles, and watch your favourite show.

Take care of yourself, you deserve it.

•  For everyone’s sake, I can’t emphasise this enough. Self-care may seem unnecessary at times, but it isn’t. Self-care makes you feel cherished. When you’re tired from the hustle and bustle, it relaxes you. Not to mention, there are thousands of ways one can perform self-care; it isn’t just about bubble baths and Vogue Beauty Secrets. Do whatever feels like self-care for you. There is no set formula, as long as it makes you feel happy. For me, it may be applying a face mask, taking an hour-long bath, and getting into my comfiest, most beautiful dress. For you, it might be different, like ordering in, or cleaning your space, or cooking your favourite dish, or maybe just sleeping with some music on. You do you, but do take care of yourself.

Set (realistic) goals of the day for yourself

• Setting goals for yourself can span a variety of ways. They can be work-related, health-related, or fun-related. Regardless of their makeup, make sure to give yourself enough time to accomplish them. Be conscious of your efforts, as this builds stronger confidence. Just knowing you are taking steps for the better will make you feel empowered.

Take up a mental activity.

• There are various actions that people on a daily to work their mentality. Though following a checklist of all these activities can be pushing it, you should always try to be engaged with at least one. One vital mental activity is running. Running isn’t just physical, it helps you mentally too. Similarly, can take up yoga, or maybe just sit in your room with some soothing music on, and close your eyes, focusing on your breathing. Mental strength can’t be equated to that of physical strength. Working your mind doesn’t always mean going on long hikes or runs, or speeding through “brain-strengthening” flashcards. Mental wellness is different for everyone, and realising that in itself is a form of mental strength.

People are not born with confidence. They gain it, they build upon it. For some, it comes easily, but for others, they have to fight as hard as they can for it. But in the end, it’s worth it. Give it a try. 

As stated in the Disney film, Raya and the Last Dragon, “It may feel impossible, but sometimes you just have to take the first step, even before you’re ready.”